Vulnerable..
Today I experienced just a fraction of how vulnerable it feels to be a patient lying on the hospital bed waiting to be examined.Currently spending some time on the Rheumatology consult service, and volunteered to be a 'simulated patient' for a teaching session on the musculoskeletal exam. Since it was an impromptu session held in a small classroom, there was no proper examining table and I had to spend a significant amount of time lying on a hard table.
It was awkward to say the least, even with the luxury of being fully clothed. Lying in an uncomfortable position, with people staring and prodding at me, I was vulnerable, insecure and self-conscious.. .
Weird thoughts started crossing my mind.. 'Is he/she staring at my crotch?'.. 'What if I fart?'.. 'I should have worn the other shirt/pants.'.. 'I should have used more deodorant.'..I was glad when the session was over, and I literally jumped off the table in a hurry..
I think it was a valuable and insightful time for me.. to remind me of the precious trust that patients place in our hands.. giving us the license to poke and to prod their bodies.. often times invading their privacy and modesty..
May we as physicians never forfeit our patient's sacred trust in us..
posted by antatosh @ 10:50 PM
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